THE NINTH COMMANDMENT — TWO ARE ONE
God may call you to be single. Or He may lead you into marriage.
Few know that the Bible actually says: Don’t want to get married. You don’t have to be married. In fact, if you do, you’ll be distracted from knowing the wonderful things of God and from serving Him with all your heart. But — if you see someone and you fall in love and you just have to have her, then, by all means, get married. That’s not a bad thing.
A marriage is a big thing in God’s eyes. Two people willing to participate in the ongoing creation of human beings. Two people willing to help each other stay on the Right Path and to help each other and their children to reach Heaven.
“And the two shall walk in one flesh.”
The two, walking; he, helping to carry; she, carrying their little one –
She’s yours. And the baby is yours together.
It won’t always be happy and easy. There’ll be work to do:
The family will have to be provided for and cared for every day, and you do it together, husband and wife, each with a set of skills to offer —
Now, the Ninth Commandment states: “Thou shalt not covet your neighbor’s wife.”
Even when she’s young and pretty and lives next door:
“The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence.” Ha Ha Ha Ha, we say, because we know, “No, it isn’t. It only seems that way.” Well, the Ninth Commandment says “Never mind the grass on the other side. It belongs to someone else, and you have your own grass, with all its familiar characteristics.”
“Thou shalt not covet . . .” that is, let desire enter into your mind, and then let desire grow and let it enter into your heart. That kind of desire makes a mess of things, and if allowed to grow, destroys the goodness around you. Coveting happens inside you and, thus, it is your responsibility alone to recognize it when it comes unbidden and to find ways to squelch illicit desire.
To covet: it’s an ugly thing. It says, “I want, I want, I want; and I don’t like what I have as much as what I want.” Coveting grows where ingratitude grows. Even though you have a bride who has become your wife who has become your companion and closest friend, it doesn’t matter. “I want to be ‘two’ with that better-looking woman — and I’m willing to rip apart the Two-Walking-As-One to be “one” in another twosome.” Thou shalt not .
Now, a word of explanation about how this Commandment is different from the Tenth Commandment, even though they both use the words: “Thou shalt not covet . . . ”
It is because God the Creator and Commander does not look upon a wife as a man’s property. She has been lovingly created and she is a man’s helpmate; that is, his completion; “At last! bone of my bones, I am no longer alone!” said Adam upon first seeing Eve. “Husbands, love your wives as you love your own selves.”
The Ninth Commandment tells men that their wives are human beings to be cherished and loved. Wives are not “property” to be used. I’m afraid, historically speaking, wives lost a lot when Protestantism took over many territories. No longer did Protestant men see the beautiful Mother of Christ reflected in the mysterious womanliness of their own wives. Wives did indeed fall under “property” laws that had become distorted, and wives “belonged” to men.
This made it easy to combine these last two Commandments into one. “Thou shalt not covet wives and property.”